Sunday, 31 August 2008

Say 'Ackee & Saltfish'

I'm not really one for getting all blurry eyed about weddings, but last weekend was an exception. The reason why? Well one of my bestest friend's (yes, that is a legitimate word in my world) tied the knot with her beau, and for me, it was if our lives had formed a full circle. Sitting at the reception listening to the obligatory speeches, the prevailing image that sprung to my mind was of me and my mate Nads sitting on the floor of my flat on a Saturday night, downing a bottle of Stones Jamaican Ginger Wine, while singing the single girl blues. "Keysh" she'd cry, "Are we ever gonna find anyone who’d want to date us, much less marry us?" Well the way things are looking at the moment Puds I really can't see it" I'd respond, revelling in self-pity. This episode which happened around seven years ago serves as a reminder that although we often can't see it at the time, our life circumstances are ever-changing. Interestingly enough, it has also highlighted the fact that being coupled up is not the be all and end all of a woman's existence (damn you fairy tales for filling the minds of little girls with all that knight in shining armour nonsense). Am I happier? Yes, I'd like to think so. But in no shape or form have my problems dissipated, they've simply changed formation. Whereas back in the day I'd spend many a tear filled lonely Saturday night fearing that I'd end up an old spinster. Now I expend those hours worrying about the fact that Rich and I are struggling to get on the property ladder in an economic climate that is severely depressing. Or failing that I fret about Khy’s entry into the school system next year - will he get into a decent school? If not, will this signal his plummet into teen violence, gangs, and all the scare mongering stories we read about in the Daily Express on a regular basis? Gosh, my list is endless, but for now it’s not about me, it’s about my dear newlywed friends. Congratulations my darlings, you made my day. 

1 comment:

VOD said...

I agree with you - many people think their lives will be happier if a man/woman comes along. Women are especially prone to falling into this line of thinking. They soon realize that, like you mentioned, life with a romantic partner brings along its own set of challenges.

Enjoy singlehood while you can. Who knows, it may help you to enjoy life with a partner more.

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I am a thirty-something African Caribbean female from South East London. My blog will shine a light on Black British culture offering the best in entertainment, fashion, beauty, community, film & music, with the occasional personal musing thrown in from yours truly. Thank you for taking out the time to peek into the pages of my diary. Now grab a cup of cocoa, relax and enjoy.